SEXUAL VIOLENCE

Sexual violence occurs whenever a person is forced, coerced, and/or manipulated into any unwanted  sexual activity, including when s/he is unable to consent due to age, illness, disability, or the influence of alcohol or other drugs. Sexual violence includes rape, incest, child sexual assault, ritual abuse, non-stranger rape, statutory rape, marital or partner rape, sexual exploitation, sexual contact, sexual harassment, exposure, and voyeurism. It is a crime not typically motivated by sexual desire but by the desire to control, humiliate, and/or harm. Sexual violence can violate a person’s trust and feeling of safety. It can, and does, happen to people of all ages, races, genders, sexual orientations, religions, professions, incomes, and ethnicity. Sexual violence affects all of us: survivors, significant others, communities, and society.

Impact on the survivor

Each survivor reacts to sexual violence in her/his own unique way. Personal style, culture, and context of the survivor’s life may affect these reactions. Some express their emotions while others prefer to keep their feelings inside. Some may tell others right away what happened, others will wait weeks, months, or even years before discussing the assault, if they ever choose to do so. It is important to respect each person’s choices and style of coping with this traumatic event.Whether an assault was completed or attempted, and regardless of whether it happened recently or many years ago, it may impact daily functioning. A wide range of reactions can impact victims. Some common emotional, psychological and physical reactions follow.

Emotional reactions

•  Guilt, shame, self blame
•  Embarrassment
•  Fear, distrust
•  Sadness
•  Vulnerability
•  Isolation
•  Lack of control
•  Anger
•  Numbness
•  Confusion
•  Shock, disbelief
•  Denial 

Psychological reactions

•  Nightmares
•  Flashbacks
•  Depression
•  Difficulty concentrating
•  Post Traumatic Stress Disorder 
•  Anxiety
•  Eating disorders
•  Substance use or abuse
•  Phobias
•  Low self esteem 

Physical reactions

•  Changes in eating or sleeping patterns
•  Increased startle response
•  Concerns about physical safety
•  Physical injury
•  Concerns about pregnancy or contracting an STI or HIV 

Impact on significant others

Sexual violence can affect parents, friends, partners, children, spouses, and/or co-workers of the survivor. As they try to make sense of what happened, significant others may experience similar reactions and feelings to those of the survivor. Fear, guilt, self-blame, and anger are but a few reactions they may experience. In order to best support the survivor, it is important for those close to them to get support. Local social services providers offer free confidential services to women, men, and children who have been affected by sexual violence. This can include advocacy-based counseling in an individual, family or group setting; information and referral services; and 24-hour crisis intervention assistance.

Impact on communities

Communities also feel the effects of sexual violence. Schools, workplaces, neighborhoods, campuses, and cultural or religious communities may feel fear, anger, or disbelief if a sexual assault happened in their community. As with any form of violence, sexual violence tears at the fabric of community well-being. Additionally, there are financial costs to communities. These costs include medical services, criminal  justice expenses, crisis and mental health services fees, and the lost contributions of individuals affect-ed by sexual violence. According to the U.S. Department of Justice the cost of crime to victims is an estimated $450 billion per year. Rape is the most costly to its victims, totaling $130 billion annually. 

Impact on society

Sexual violence endangers critical societal structures through climates of violence and fear. According to the U.S. Merit Systems Protection Board, sexual harassment alone cost the federal government an estimated $327 million in losses associated with job turnover, sick leave, and individual and group productivity among federal employees. Fifty percent of rape victims lost or were forced to quit their jobs in the year following their rapes due to the severity of their reactions. Scholars at Johns Hopkins University School of Public Health indicated that development of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is likely in 50 to 95 percent of rape cases. Lifetime income loss, due to sexual violence in adolescence, is estimated at $250,600. The contributions and achievements that may never come as a result of sexual violence is a cost to society that can’t be measured.

What can be done to prevent sexual

violence?

Be Aware

Be an active partner in a relationship. Arranging where to meet, what to do, and when to be intimate should all be shared decisions.

Listen carefully. Take the time to hear what the other person is saying. If you feel s/he is not being direct or is giving you a "mixed message", ask for a clarification.

Know your sexual intentions and limits. You have the right to say "No" to any unwanted sexual contact. If you are uncertain about what you want, ask the person to respect your feelings.

Communicate your limits firmly and directly. If you say "No", say it like you mean it. Don't give mixed messages. Back up your words with a firm tone of voice and clear body language.

Don't assume that your date will automatically know how you feel, or will eventually "get the message" without your having to tell him or her.

Don't fall for the common stereotype that when a person says "No" it really means "Yes". "No" means "No". If someone says "No" to sexual contact, believe it and stop.

Remember that some people think that drinking heavily, dressing provocatively, or going to a person's room indicates a willingness to have sex. Be especially careful to communicate your limits and intentions clearly in such situations.

Be aware that having sex with someone who is mentally or physically incapable of giving consent is rape. If you have sex with someone who is drugged, intoxicated, passed out, incapable of saying "No", or unaware of what is happening, you may be guilty of rape.

Don't make assumptions about a person's behavior. Don't automatically assume that someone wants to have sex just because s/he drinks heavily, dresses provocatively, or agrees to go to your room. Don't assume that just because the other person has had sex with you previously s/he is willing to have sex with you again. Also don't assume that just because the person consents to kissing or other sexual intimacies s/he is willing to have sexual intercourse.

Listen to your gut feelings. If you feel uncomfortable or think you may be at risk, leave the situation immediately and go to a safe place.

Be especially careful in group situations. Be prepared to resist pressure from friends to participate in violent or criminal acts.

Attend large parties with friends you can trust. Agree to "look out" for one another. Try to leave with a group, rather than alone or with someone you don't know very well.

Don't be afraid to "make waves" if you feel threatened. If you feel you are being pressured or coerced into sexual activity against your will, don't hesitate to state your feelings and get out of the situation. Better a few minutes of social awkwardness or embarrassment than the trauma of sexual assault.

Be Active

Get involved if you believe someone is at risk. If you see a person in trouble at a party or a friend using force or pressuring another person, don't be afraid to intervene. You may save someone from the trauma of sexual assault and your friend from the ordeal of criminal prosecution.

Confront others' rape jokes and remarks; explain to others why these jokes are not funny and the harm they can cause.

Confront other people's harassment--verbal or physical. Harassment is not experienced as flattery, but as a threat.

Educate others about what rape really is. Help them to clear up any misconceptions they might have.

Ask someone who you don't recognize what they are doing in your dorm or residence, or who it is they are looking for.

Confront potential rape scenes. When you see a someone verbally harassing another person, stand by to see if s/he the person being harassed needs help. If a someone is hitting or holding a person against his or her will, do something immediately to help.

When walking in groups or even alone be conscious as you approach another person. Be aware of how afraid that person might feel, and give him or her space on the street if possible.

Be supportive of person's actions to control their own lives and make their own decisions. Don't be afraid to express these ideas.

If someone you know has expressed violent feelings or demonstrated violent behavior in a particular relationship, try to help him or her find an appropriate person with whom to talk (such as a counselor, RA, clergy, etc)